I believe that SMILE is contagious !

I believe that SMILE is contagious !

Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Happy Me

This heavy heart, you would't understand.
The unexplainable pain I felt when I see your smiling face.
Your smile was so precious to me
So precious I would trade it with anything
How I used to save my money to buy your favorite characters dolls
How I used to stay up all night to listen to your worries, and stay up even later after you sleep to pray about it
All those things I do to see your smile
Never knew that what I have to do is trade it with mine
Never knew what is takes to make you happy is to let you go

You know your smile makes me happy
Even though I'm without one

Seeing you happily walk towards a beautiful future,
I know it's my part to wish you well
Accepting that I am your past

And to walk towards my own future
where there is no struggling you and i
Just a happy you
And I believe, soon, a happy me :)

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Better Days

Life gives us millions reason to smile..
Nice friends..
Great delicious foods..
Funny stories..
Sweet gestures..
How great it is to enjoy every details of happiness in our life.
But sometimes we tend to be absorbed by the small things that doesn't go the way we want..
Most of the times it's not a big deal..
But why can't we just see the complete pictures.. of how wonderful the world is :)

Love each other .. appreciate ..

And see how your world turn so much brighter :)

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

Life Beneath the Rain

It's been a while i haven't pour my heart into words..
My world has its ups and downs..
It was never flat for the last couple of years and i'm grateful for that..
For all the fluttery feelings that makes me feel like the earth is a such a beautiful place and the tears of burdens that made me realize that it's not.. I'm grateful for all the things God allow me to experience. Even though i do hope He is being a little bit more gentle with it :)
Anyway all the things i've gone through shows how big His trust in me..
Despite of everything, recently it's always raining..
And i love it.
I love rain and how the sky seems like smiling peacefully.
And I love how everyone seems to be a lot calmer under it.

Monday, March 7, 2016

Only Hope

Do you ever hold on for something so tight, you asked yourself why..
And even scold yourself because you thought it's a stupidity..
And no one knows it better than you.
I do..
I, too, asked myself why i often stay on a hurting situation..
Why spend the sleepless nights,
Why can't i let go..
(Sleep is precious, right?)
But i think i found the answer why..
Well..
Even though it will forever be a maybe..
Maybe because you bring me to the doors that I've been searching for, door that will bring me out of this labyrinth of loneliness
Being with you, I see a glimpse light
So maybe that's the reason why it's hard to let you go
Because as much as i'm tired and mad..
How is it possible to let it go?
You're the key to that door..
You're my only hope.

Friday, February 20, 2015

Thoughts #1

It's cold~ but i only want a warmth from You. Because any other warmth will leave and make it even colder.

Mobile Blogger

So i just downloaded the blogger apps on my phone. Which is pretty cool.. and make me wanna continue writing on this blog. Some might be short, others might be long. I'll try to write more bcs truthfully I always like to share my thoughts.. i just never have the time or chance to pour it out :) so, this is my first mobile post... look out for the next!

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Dear World,

If happiness is what we're all humans aiming for...

Maybe we should stop fighting

or else we can try to stop arguing

by being less demanding

and start enjoying

every little moments that are passing by

dragging away unreachable happiness that we're looking for..

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

The hurting world

The chain never ends.

A hurts B. B hurts C. C hurts D and so on..
We are living in a hurting world, where all living human has this experience of being hurt.
Sad but true.

And we can't do anything to prevent others from hurting us.
Some losers will try to stop loving, pretend not to care, in order to guard their heart from getting hurt.
They decide not to love, not to live, and waste their life not taking chances.
Yes.. they continue hurting themselves.

Do not let the fear of getting hurt prevent us from living the meaningful life
What we can do.. is simply to stop hurting others.

We all need to heal, somehow.
And there's this one important thing we need to remember:
Hurting back or hurting others won't help the healing process.. at all.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Marriage and Shoes

Marriage is like choosing a pair of shoes yang akan kita pakai seumur hidup.
Wow.
Terdengar menakutkan kah?
Buat yang koleksi sepatu mungkin iya.
Tapi kurang lebih keadaannya memang seperti itu.
Daripada pilih yang modelnya keliatan bagus tapi dipakai sakit, lebih baik pilih yang biasa aja tapi nyaman dipakai.

Pada umumnya, sebagai manusia normal, kita memang selalu tergiur dengan sepatu yang modelnya bagus. Sampai kemudian kita coba pakai dan ternyata sakit. Seunik, semenarik atau sebagus apapun keliatannya sepatu itu, sebagian besar orang yang pintar akan menaruh kembali sepatu itu di rak walaupun dengan berat hati. Well, daripada menderita seumur hidup.

Sebagian lainnya, bakal tetap maksain membeli sepatu itu dengan alasan “terlanjur suka”. Mungkin sambil mikir “gpp deh sakit dikit, I can handle this kind of pain.. I really like this shoes!” dan mereka terus berjalan dalam kesakitan sampai pada titik dimana mereka tidak tahan lagi.. baru kemudian bercerai.

Sekarang, jika kita lihat dari perspektif sebaliknya..
Gimana caranya ya jadi sepatu yang nyaman?
Supaya waktu kita ketemu “that great man” and he decide to try to put us on, he’s not going to feel hurt, and abandon us.
Yup! We need to be comfortable shoes so that he’ll decide to wear us forever.
It’s our homework to shape ourself rightly, fellow shoes!
We need to understand them, being there for them, listen to their problems, care about them sincerely, stop being selfish, and.. take care of our personal appearance. Sepatu yang nyaman kalo modelnya terlalu butut juga kan susah ^^

Monday, March 28, 2011

a good heart

One wrong decision can affect our whole life tremendously..
Especially..
a decision to love.
and a decision to leave.
Sometimes we decide to leave a person who’s been there all along to pursue love of another.
Only to find in the end, what we decide to leave.. is our true happiness.
Life’s going to be so much easier if there’s a sign or precaution that pops out when we’re about to make a wrong decision.
Here’s the good news.. There is!
It is called a good heart.
Your heart knows what it wants. Keep it pure, ego-free. Don’t let it affected by movies, songs, or even fairy tales.
It’s so scary how this little part of human complexity has so much power.
It can bring you up to the highest sky, or down to the deepest shit.

So, the question is..
Can you trust your heart?

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

1 second away

This is the truth you might not realize
about what's going on deep in my heart

I have 101 ways to make you happy
For a second I think "Eh, we might be able to work it out"
For a second I was going to tell you

I selected your name on my phone
I typed those words that will change our life forever
Hey.. we are only 1 second away from our happiness :)

Only 1 second away

1 click away

But then I changed my mind..

On that particulat moment, you might be sleeping or walking or playing with your dogs

You were 1 second away from your happiness

But you never knew..

You will never know.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

Fairy Tale

You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales.
Where good guys always win, and the bad guy comes with a scary face and wearing a black robe.
Things were so easy back then.
Because we know, in the end, the good guys will win.
and they will live happily ever after.
But as you grow older, you realize.. that good guys not always win
and the bad guy.. they don't wear a black robe. They have a perfect smile and know exactly how to make you happy.
The trap of mere happiness.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Aku. Dan notes terakhir di taun 2010.

Friday, December 31, 2010
9.21 pm
Tahun yang luarr biasa. Tahun yang sarat dengan pelajaran. Soal cinta. Soal pengorbanan. Soal prioritas. Soal kegagalan.
Soal apa yang penting dalam hidup dan apa yang tidak.
Soal cinta..
Tadinya aku selalu mencari sosok sempurna yang bisa kucintai, beribu syarat yang ada di benakku untuk si penerima hati. Aku selalu berpikir “bagaimana mungkin bisa menghabiskan seluruh hidupku bersama dengan org yang keras kepala, kasar, atau pemalas?” Di satu sisi benar, dengan karakteristik seperti itu tentu mereka tidak akan menjadi suami yang baik. Itu kata logika. Namun tahun ini aku diajarkan..ternyata saat kita mencintai seseorang kita akan dapat menerima kelemahannya. Saat ia keras kepala, hati akan bersabar, tersenyum dan mengelus pundaknya. Saat ia kasar, hati akan mengerang pelan, membalut luka, lalu memaafkan. Saat ia malas, hati akan menegur, menariknya, memberi semangat, namun tidak akan meninggalkannya sendirian.
Akhirnya aku mengerti, ternyata tidak perlu menemukan sosok sempurna untuk dicintai..karena hanya ketulusan cinta yang akan membuatnya sempurna.
Soal pengorbanan..
Aku adalah sosok egois, sejak dahulu selalu mempertimbangkan untung rugi dalam segala hal. Tahun ini aku belajar.. cinta dapat membuat kita rela berkorban apa saja. Apa saja asal ia bahagia.. Ya, apa saja. Rasa yang begitu berbahaya. Bagaimana bila jatuh pada oknum yang tidak bertanggung jawab? Bagaimana bila disalahgunakan? Sedih. Kecewa. Air mata yang terus menetes. Namun tetap berkorban sampai akhir. Karena senyum yang sesekali terlukis di wajahnya itu dapat menghapus segala kesedihan dan kekecewaan dalam sekejap mata. Cinta menghilangkan kemampuan kita untuk menikmati segala sesuatu..seorang diri. Makanan terlezat dan pemandangan terindah baru terasa berarti bila dinikmati melalui panca inderanya. Saat itulah kita menyadari..satu-satunya sumber kebahagiaan kita adalah kebahagiaannya. And it’s amazing how far we would be willing to sacrifice for that person we love ☺
Soal prioritas..
Banyak hal penting dalam hidup ini. Keluarga, cinta, pendidikan, agama, karir, sahabat.. Lalu manakah yang seharusnya diutamakan? Bagaimana bila cinta itu menelan seluruh perhatian dan pikiran kita, sehingga tidak ada lagi ruang untuk mengasihi keluarga, menjalankan perintah agama, ataupun mengutamakan pendidikan. Maka cinta itu telah menjelma menjadi cinta yang tak sehat. Cinta yang sehat tidak akan menghancurkan kehidupan kita, sebaliknya ia akan membuat kita semakin mencintai keluarga dan sahabat, semakin tekun menuruti perintah agama, dan semakin semangat dalam mengejar prestasi. Orang pesimis menyebutnya hal ini terlalu muluk, namun siapapun yang pernah jatuh cinta pasti mengerti. Karena cinta membuat kita selalu ingin menjadi lebih baik, untuk dia. Untuk dapat menjadi sosok yang dibanggakannya.
Satu lagi mengenai prioritas.. Terkadang kita terlalu terfokus pada orang-orang yang kita sayangi. Mungkin di mata mereka kita hanyalah debu, namun kita tak berhenti memerhatikannya. Tak berenti berharap suatu hari nanti ia akan sadar betapa besar dan luas kasih yang kita tawarkan. Sadar akan pintu kebahagiaan yang terbuka lebar untuknya. Lalu bagaimana dengan orang2 yang menyayangi kita? Bagaimana dengan debu yang juga menantikan perhatian, pintu kebahagiaan yang terbuka lebar untuk kita? Kita tersakiti dan menyakiti. Menantikan dan dinantikan. Tinggal menunggu siapa yang terlebih dahulu tersadar dan menghentikan kebodohan tersebut. Berhenti menanti! Karena ada pintu lain yang terbuka lebar, menantikanmu.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Dear You..

Dear you,

We haven't met yet. What's on your mind, how are you feeling, what are you dreaming of.. i don't have a clue. But let me tell you something.. someday, in a particular place at a particular time, we will meet. Don't ask me how we fall in love. Eventually I will learn to accept your imperfections and you will learn to accept mine. And we will decide to face this world together, build our warm house together. I know this is not a fairytale, we will need to work hard for our relationship. I will learn to understand every bits of your unusual habit and oh-i-hope-you-don't-mind-my-stubbornnes =) i like my breakfast on bed, two piece of bread with a glass of milk, if you're a lazy ass i will take it myself from the kitchen and bring it to our bed. Calm down, i wouldn't make it a mess since I'll be the one to clean the bed afterwards.

There's so much more I want to share with you. But i gotta go now, someday I'll continue this letter.

Love,

Someone, you haven't met.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Inspirative

Thursday, July 15, 2010

My night has come. Where's my moon?

Something is wrong..

Something is really wrong...

I just realized this fact a couple of days ago.. At that time, I really want to go hug and tell someone about this confusing feeling but I don’t know where to turn to.. I don’t know how should I start the conversation, how to express the mess I’m feeling inside.

I couldn’t find the right word, the right description of this feeling. As far as I know, the sky doesn’t look as blue as usual, the sun doesn’t shine as bright, the funniest movie incapable of making me hear that sound I’m longing for.. my own laugh, I don’t sleep well at night, and cold water in the morning doesn’t cools down the heat I feel in my heart.

Then I took a look in the mirror, stretched some particular cheek muscles and there! I saw a smile.. It hit me so hard. The me in the mirror actually look happy. Even with those unrecognizable feeling I feel inside, I can still smile. That smile make everything seems okay. That curve I formed in my face is better than any mascara, lipstick, or eye-liner. It’s so natural, yet it has the same core function. It’s the best make up ever existed.

Yeah. My smile is my make up.

What an incredible make up..

too bad it doesn’t heal anything.

My night has come. My sun has gone. It’s about time looking for a moon, or a flashlight at least.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Fenomena yang sering terlupa, tentang bulan..

Bulan yang baik hati..

Kamu adalah ciptaan yang paling setia dan rendah hati. Terima kasih karena dengan adanya satu hal baik seperti kamu di tengah dunia ini, manusia tidak perlu merasakan derita gelapnya malam. Kamu yang sebaik hati itu, pasti merasakan kesenangan tak terkira karena selalu dibutuhkan setiap malam, bisa membantu seluruh makhluk hidup ketika mereka melewati masa-masa yang paling gelap dalam hidup mereka, yaitu ketika mereka ditinggalkan oleh matahari. Matahari yang selalu diagung-agungkan sebagai si sumber kehidupan, sehingga ia begitu tinggi hati dan pergi meninggalkan kita setiap hari. Tidak pernah ada seharipun dimana ia tidak pergi. Ia selalu pergi. Kami selalu ditinggalkannya. Tapi bagi kami ia tetap penting. Justru karena kami tau suatu saat ia akan pergi, kami begitu menghargai cahayanya. Tapi kamu tak pernah pergi, selalu menjaga kami, berjaga-jaga agar begitu matahari pergi kami tidak sedetikpun mengalami kegelapan total.

Kamu tidak sekuat matahari. Matahari dapat memproduksi sendiri cahayanya, without any effort. Sedangkan cahayamu adalah hasil dari kasih sayang. Kamu yang tidak memiliki kemampuan untuk memproduksi cahaya, Kami tidak dapat membayangkan seberapa keras usahamu, sehingga kamu yang tidak dianugrahi kemampuan membuat cahaya, dapat bercahaya seindah itu. Untuk kami yang jarang bersyukur ini. Kami yang melupakan kehadiranmu saat datangnya matahari.

Jangan pernah tanyakan mengapa kami begitu mencintai matahari. Padahal memandangnya tidak pernah seindah memandangmu. Mata kami mungkin sakit bahkan sampai buta apabila terlalu lama menatapnya. Sedangkan menatapmu merupakan suatu keindahan saat kami sulit terlelap.

Bulan..
Aku memahami perasaan itu. Karena apa yang kau alami, sekarang ku alami. Perasaan senang dibutuhkan setiap malam, dan ditelantarkan saat matahari terbit.

Bulan..
Apakah terlalu rakus bagi kita untuk berharap, ada yang menyadari bahwa pada siang hari pun bulan tidak pernah pergi. Hanya tertutup oleh silaunya cahaya sang matahari.

Friday, May 21, 2010

The wall



I'm sorry for the wall. But I guess I can't help it. I can't knock them down by myself :( I need you. Still need you.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010